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A funny thing happens when I get bored, I go out and test drive cars.  A lot of times it doesn't matter necessarily what kind or model of car I am test driving, it is more about the "hunt" to be able to get cars off dealer lots.

Unlike Agent 001 who has access to press fleets, my forays into driving other peoples cars usually involves a little finesse in getting a chance to drive a lot of cars.

One of the drawbacks of where I live is there simply aren't a lot of car dealers and as such a little discretion is necessary as unlike larger markets the salespeople where I live tend to remember a face as good looking as mine. 

While in LA last weekend however, I was able to get out and drive a couple different cars.  My brother in law is currently in the market for a new car narrowing down his choices to the Mini Cooper S, Honda Civic Si and Volkswagen GTI.  I wanted to drive the Honda Fit as well having read numerous article heaping praise upon this little car from Honda.

The Mini Cooper S was up first, and after the salesperson asked a few pre-qualifying questions, we were off.  I was extremely impressed with the strength of the turbo charged engine.  Having owned the supercharged 2003 Cooper S, this new motor was strong and quick easily besting the older engine.

Since people shopping for a Civic Si normally wouldn't cross shop it with a Honda Fit, driving both cars required stops at 2 different Honda dealers.  Driven back to back with the Cooper S, the Civic Si felt gutless with very little torque and a gearbox that demanded to be shifter frequently to keep the engine in its sweet spot.  The sound of the engine as the VTEC kicked in however was musical, and encourages one to run the engine to the red line each and every time.

Later in the day I got to drive the Honda Fit.  I have to be honest with you, I was really impressed with this little car.  Powerful or quick it is not, but it handled great and the engine was smooth and didn't mind being pushed to its limits.  Would I buy one, probably not.  But, I certainly understand why people do buy this car.

In all my years of test driving cars, a couple of things have become readily apparent to me as I go from dealer to dealer driving other peoples cars.

#1.  Only about 1 in 10 cars salesman are car nuts.  For the other 9, it is simply a job.  In most cases the car guy is also consistently the monthly sales leader.

#2.  In no other field would a business card with wite-out over the last persons name be used as a means of keeping contact with a potential customer.  Could you imagine your stock broker, insurance agent or doctor giving you a card which had a handwritten name over wite-out.

#3.  While it is never my intention to "waste" peoples time with a test drive, very few sales people even bother to ask qualifying questions to weed out lookers from buyers.  A test drive alone doesn't sell cars, so don't be so quick to offer one.

#4.  If you don't know the answer to a question, DON'T ANSWER IT JUST TO ANSWER IT.  It just makes you look stupid, the easier thing is to simply answer honestly, and then work to find the answer.

#5.  Am I the only one who misses the "showroom" experience wherein cars actually sat on showroom floors.  Most dealers now a days have either rows of cubicles or tables where cars once sat.  Maybe it was a simpler time, but I for one miss the cars on the showroom floor, and being able to inspect cars in heated or cooled comfort of the indoors.

My list could go one, but it is more fun if you add a few observations of your own to it.

Since I have been on so many test drives throughout the years, a story or two has come about as a result.

One of the funniest experiences I had involved a Nissan Altima with the 3.5 liter V6 and the 5-speed manual transmission.  The sales guy couldn't wait to get me out on a test drive, however dealership policy dictated that he had to drive the car off the lot.  The only problem was he couldn't drive a manual.  After stalling several times, he asked me to drive the car off the lot.  The sales guy was really talking up how powerful the Altima was, and telling me all the things the car could do, so I asked him if he wanted me to show him.  He nodded his head yes, so I revved up the engine and dropped the clutch lighting up the front wheels in a cloud of smoke.  After several blocks of running at full throttle I executed a full emergency stop followed by a quick right turn again spinning the right front wheel as I rounded the corner.  The sales guy had the biggest grin on his face as he got to experience all the things he told me the car could do.

Arriving back at the dealer, the sales guy told me he had to park the car, so to help him since he couldn't drive manual I line the car up to help him out.  He managed to get the car moving in reverse and promptly backed into another car.  While there was no damage to either car, when asked if I wanted to buy the car I told him "No" stating it had been in an accident.

I could go on for hours about other experiences, but I think it would be more fun to hear some of your experiences.  Good, bad or just funny, what things have you had happened to you when you have gone looking for a new car?



Confessions of A Test Drive Junkie: Funny Experiences & Observations Behind The Wheel of Other People's Cars!

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Agent00J