JAGUAR DUMPSTER FIRE! WHO Would Have Thought The CREEPIEST Rebrand EVER Would Produce Even CREEPIER SALES?

JAGUAR DUMPSTER FIRE! WHO Would Have Thought The CREEPIEST Rebrand EVER Would Produce Even CREEPIER SALES?
Jaguar’s 2025 rebrand, slammed as the “creepiest ever,” has driven the luxury carmaker into a tailspin, with sales plummeting to near oblivion. Today, June 30, 2025, reports confirmed a catastrophic 97% sales drop in Europe for April, with just 49 vehicles sold—a stark contrast to the 1,961 registered the previous year. Yet, bizarrely, this PR nightmare has sparked a niche sales frenzy, proving even a dumpster fire can ignite profit.

The rebrand ditched Jaguar’s sleek heritage for a dystopian vibe. The new logo, a jagged neon-green claw mark on a void-black canvas, screams haunted arcade. Showrooms now mimic sci-fi horror sets, with flickering LEDs and eerie growls. The tagline, “Unleash the Abyss,” pairs with ads showing Jaguars racing through apocalyptic wastes, headlights glowing demonic red. X users mocked it as “a possessed panther’s fever dream,” with memes comparing the logo to a cursed tattoo.

Analysts are split. With Europe’s 97% plunge exposing the rebrand’s risks, Jaguar’s feral pivot is looking like a death knell.






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