If on the other hand you do know about cars, then you will also not be very interested to hear what the Evo is like. Because when it comes to four-wheel-drive turbo cars for the PlayStation generation, all eyes are currently on the Nissan GT-R – the most eagerly anticipated new arrival since God stuck a pin in a map and decided on Bethlehem.
The fact is, though, that the Nissan is going to be upwards of £50,000, about 15 grand more than the little Itchypussy. And I’m sorry but I cannot see, with the current laws of physics in place, how it can possibly be that much better.
The previous nine Evos were always exquisite to drive, nicer even than their great rivals from Subaru. But they were also woefully flimsy, stylistically challenged and hard to the point of hopelessness. For one lap of the Nürburgring, you’d use an Evo every time. For the journey home, you’d take the Scooby-Doo.
Now, though, everything has changed. The new Subaru is about as much fun as a church service. And it doesn’t look good in photographs because, like me, it doesn’t look good at all. I’ve seen more attractive things in medical books.
The Evo X, on the other hand, looks fab. Peel away the bulges and all that carbon fibre flotsam and jetsam – all of which gives other road users an impression that for you driving may be a hobby, like trainspotting – and the basic shape is very good. And then . . . Oh. My. God. There’s the way it drives.
I fear I may have to get a bit technical here. When you turned into a corner in an old Evo, initially there’d be a dribble of dreary understeer. In a normal car this is a speed-scrubbing health and safety warning that soon there will be ambulances and fire but in the Mitsubishi it was simply a portal through which you had to pass to get at the car’s heart and soul......
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