TWO HOURS OF LIFE YOU WILL NEVER GET BACK:SpeedRacer - A Movie Review

We all love cars, we wouldn't be on this site if we didn't.  So when a movie comes out that features cars, anticipation runs high.  I remember the first time I saw the previews for Gone in 60 Seconds, or the Italian Job.  Even the Disney movie Cars had me excited.

But...

Trust me on this one, a highly trained Agent working here at AutoSpies when I tell you, SpeedRacer was horrible.  I like going to the movies, the sites, the sounds, the smell of fresh overpriced popcorn.  The whole experience for me is usually a positive.  And along those lines knowing that the overall ambiance of the movie going experience is normally a good one, I joined some friends last night in watching SpeedRacer.

In all fairness going in to this movie I knew it would probably entail a week plot and a lot of CGI interspersed with some halfway decent racing scenes.

And boy was I wrong.

We weren't 10 minutes into the movie before I suggested to my friends to leave the movie and hit a local Cigar shop called Stogies where we could sip on beer and enjoy a decent cigar.  Sadly I was out voted.

Not out voted because I was missing something the others were seeing, but rather because one of our group grew up on SpeedRacer and had to know how it ended.

Allow me to give you the gift of time, for if you don't go see this movie, I will have in essence given you 2 hours of your life back that you would have wasted getting annoyed like I was watching this STUPID, STUPID, STUPID movie.

And sadly when this STUPID movie finally let out the Cigar shop was closed so we basically lost twice by not being able to relax and enjoy a good smoke, but now had our minds filtering the crap we had just watched.

Since this movie sucked as bad as it did, I would anticipate if being on DVD by Tuesday, so you could always rent or buy the DVD to view at home, but again that would be wasting time better spent doing ANYTHING other than watching this movie.

And for that I pause to say that the makers of this movie could have taken the cartoon concept of the movie and made a halfway believable story line thereby producing a movie that was at least palatable.

Well, enough of my time has been spent reviewing this movie, I implore you to save your time and money and avoid this movie at all cost.  I have posted the trailer here because it tells the whole story in a nutshell in 2 minutes versus the 2 hours 15 minutes the movie needed.

Have a great weekend.

Carboy - 5/10/2008 10:55:31 AM

+4 Boost

And why did you watch a movie tageting 5 year olds?

Agent00J - 5/10/2008 11:30:06 AM

+4 Boost

Perhaps the inner child compelled me to go.

KZ258 - 5/10/2008 11:25:53 AM

0 Boost

just based on these 2 comments, i wont be watching it and i'll make sure i put my "2 hours" to good use by doin some charity work instead

Agent00J - 5/10/2008 11:34:48 AM

+4 Boost

I guess the whole point of weak plot was missed by you in your haste to get to the bottom to insult me.

But in fairness to you, weak plot aside the CGI was distracting, a dizzying array of bright neon colored lights with more flashbacks interspersed than the old TX show Twin Peaks.

A true Agent I am, an idiot, yeah, I have been called that a time or two as well, but normally by people who have spent at least a little time with me.

Short attention span, you betcha. ( I had to look up to see your entire comment as my short attention span caused me to forget you were even insulting me )

KZ258 - 5/10/2008 2:13:26 PM

0 Boost

ooj, i dont think much people on here will care about the plot of a family oriented movie.

BlackM45 - 5/10/2008 11:34:53 AM

+4 Boost

Quit smoking and you can have 2 YEARS of your life back.

silver1 - 5/12/2008 11:13:42 AM

+2 Boost

LOL!

theoptimisticpessimist - 5/10/2008 12:58:55 PM

+2 Boost

Boy, your redundant, you just repeat yourself, you say the same thing over and over.

Agent00J - 5/10/2008 1:51:14 PM

+3 Boost

The Mach 5 was pretty cool looking with what little they actually showed of the car. The movie was such that a whole lot of images were constantly being thrown up at the screen with no real sense of why.

In terms of Batman, I am a HUGE Batman fan. I can't wait to see The Dark Knight. I have seen EVERY Batman movie made since Michael Keaton took on the Joker on opening day, a thing my wife still doesn't understand. Check out this cool money clip:
http://www.skymall.com/shopping/detail.htm?pid=69771983&c=

And yes, I am a car enthusiast, but I appreciate you asking.

KZ258 - 5/10/2008 2:23:20 PM

-2 Boost

ooj how old are you btw?

Agent00J - 5/10/2008 5:21:36 PM

+2 Boost

Agent 00J is 33 years old.

EL34 - 5/10/2008 1:47:59 PM

-1 Boost

I went to the Irvine Spectrum outdoor mall yesterday to get my mom a Mothers Day gift and they had the 2008 Speed Racer car on display and the guy that did the voice from the original Speed Racer cartoon.

http://photos.igougo.com/images/p262800-Orange_County_CA-Spectrum_Entertainment_Center.JPG

DaHarder - 5/10/2008 2:55:23 PM

-1 Boost

Maybe You Should Relegate Yourself To Pseudo-Automotive Writings And Leave The Movie Reviews To The More Capable?

S4cabriofoxone - 5/10/2008 9:30:19 PM

+2 Boost

This is the first post you've made in weeks (months?), and all it does is insult 00J?

Classy.

0to60 - 5/11/2008 1:17:33 PM

+2 Boost

Yea, where have you been!?! But I kinda agree that he should leave the movie reviews to the professionals

CanadaCraig - 5/10/2008 3:50:22 PM

+3 Boost

Well.... I for one APPRECIATE the review. Thanks. Craig

no1listensanyway - 5/10/2008 3:52:25 PM

-1 Boost

Speedracer?? How old are your dude? What do you get paid for again?

Agent00J - 5/10/2008 5:24:43 PM

+3 Boost

I am 33, I get paid to write about all things automotive. Had I written about Baby Mama or Made of Honor, I would be heckled to death on here as having no relevance, but I try to save you from wasting time and money watching a CAR RELATED MOVIE and I get criticized.

I guess I can't please all the people all the time...

SHOWTIME - 5/10/2008 7:45:10 PM

+2 Boost

Agent00J, I appreciate your comments on this movie.

For those that aren't thankful for your input and give wise remarks, don't bother responding to them. They're simply idiots who aren't happy with their own lives so they always have something negative to say back.

KZ258 - 5/10/2008 8:21:55 PM

+3 Boost

ooj no need to take it personally. we bash on oo1's bias towards BMW all the time ;)

KZ258 - 5/10/2008 8:22:51 PM

0 Boost

"Speedracer?? How old are your dude? What do you get paid for again?"

i already asked that LOL

no1listensanyway - 5/10/2008 10:08:03 PM

0 Boost

Cant you guys take a little hazing?? OOJ is a freshman around here. So he likes kid movies - thats cool. Everyone needs to lighten a little bit.

BTW, Showtime a blog or chat is no different then any open forum where you are allowed to voice your opinion whether it be positive or negative. Get off your soap box.

S4cabriofoxone - 5/10/2008 9:31:01 PM

0 Boost

He took the time to tell us to avoid this movie, so I don't understand what the negative comments are for. It's a favor. Read it and move on.

jasonhutchcraft - 5/10/2008 9:40:36 PM

+2 Boost

I have to say that you should have given it a chance. Speed Racer was dynamite! The whole movie was cool. Seriously, the best colors and special effects out there. I would say that this is an iconic film for movies based on an anime. I can't believe that you are being so harsh on it because you wanted to go smoke a cigar. A cigar. A cigar. A cigar. A cigar. Does that get irritating? Yeah, thats how irritated I got every time I read that you wanted to go smoke a cigar at a cigar bar. cigarbargarbarbargarbar. I think you are hating on it, thats my honest opinion. And no, the plot is not shallow, it has a lot of things and details going on in it. Its a story about a guy who is the best at what he does, and having to decide if family money and leisure are more important than the thrill of racing. Easy description, but it would require quite a few more paragraphs to go into real depth. I'm going to shut up now, but you should give the movie a break. I thought it was great. If you like movies as artistic experiences or you just like a summer blockbuster escape, you cannot go wrong with this film. Unless you smoke cigars, then youre just old.

sector - 5/11/2008 12:21:46 AM

+1 Boost

The movie industry died when they introduced CGI. Thoughtful, imaginative and well thought out movie scripts are the thing of the past. This the video game generation and immediate visual gratification in every seen is the key for selling tickets. Scripts are written "after the fact" now to just appease the series of "cool" special effects visual sequences that have been choreographed. I Guess we have Lucas to thank for this :)

Matthew1 - 5/11/2008 2:24:14 AM

0 Boost

While I somewhat disagree with your deeply cynical view, it amazes me you cannot transfer the insightful discussion witnessed here onto the topic of CARS.

Matthew1 - 5/11/2008 2:31:57 AM

0 Boost

I apologise, I got mixed up between you and 'autopro'.

Although your 'Piano on the roof' comment re: 1-series was questionable.

jasonhutchcraft - 5/11/2008 1:24:57 PM

+2 Boost

I know a few people in the Computer Graphics industry. They are extremely talented and dedicated artists whose vision and message is totally beyond visual gratification. To even say something like what auto001 said is completely ignorant. You clearly have no idea as to how much time and effort it takes to get a job in the industry. I am in school to do just that, and I have been working my ass off for years perfecting my artistic ability. The students I work with have seen all of the movies of the past as well as the Effects laden films of today. Keep in mind that special effects have been around since the beginning of cinema. Everything that you see in the movies that is on film yesterday as well as today is manipulated at least in some way. The "videogame generation" is aware of the movies of the past, and we try everyday to improve on it in some way. I think its time that you guys lightened up a bit and gave the new generation a chance. I was a bit harsh on 00j, but he's a grown up, he'll live.

sector - 5/11/2008 2:10:52 PM

+1 Boost

I apologise for the harsh commentary... I wasn't trying to denigrate the CGI industry as a whole and the hard work and dedication you guys infuse into every work. I was blown away by movies like Jurassic Park, Titanic and the Perfect Storm (with its flawless emulation of the vast seas), I see these as examples of the tremendous benefits it can have to further this medium. However, I feel this tech is a double edged sword sometimes, in that, it gives the director "too much" visual power, and as they get obsessed with the "looks" of the film, the overall effort to tell a good story get lost. I love the classic trilogy, but I guess I'm still kind of disappointed with George about how the new Star Was movies turned out :)

OBie - 5/11/2008 11:23:11 PM

+2 Boost

People [white businessmen] still smoke cigars in this country??? To quote George Carlin in "You are all Diseased": " Sigmund Freud said sometimes a cigar is a cigar. Oh Yeah! Well sometimes its a big brown d%#k!!!" Sorry, couldn't resist (Big Carlin fan).

Any who, appreciate your view on this movie, but I'm still gonna give it a chance. Two reasons: 1- I grew up watching Speed Racer (one of my favorite cartoons when growing up) and 2- as a designer, I'm open-minded and appreciate different design ideas / style and art mediums.

Now, I understand you didn't like the movie (not hating on you for that), but it seems that you're getting so much negative comment because of the way you said it. Just my two cents.

bayareaspeedracer - 5/12/2008 4:01:37 PM

+1 Boost

I cannot agree with you more. This movie sucked. I can't believe I saw this in the theater..

993Turbo - 5/13/2008 6:18:19 AM

0 Boost

My son saw it and he didn't even like it.

SisterOf00J - 5/15/2008 1:27:40 PM

+1 Boost

I have never watched the cartoon. I am dreading having to go see this movie. My husband is a fan and cannot wait. Lucky for me, we have bills to pay and he would rather see Indy when it comes out.

As for 00J's short attention span regarding this movie: I have read similar reviews lamenting staying for the whole thing. And... wait... what was I saying?