General Motors, in a fever dream of corporate midlife crisis, birthed the Corvette E-Ray—half supercar, half Prius that swallowed a lightning bolt—and now they’re sweating whether to euthanize it. Spoiler: they should’ve left it in the petri dish.
WHO WANTS IT? Nobody with a pulse, that’s who.
Let’s start with the name. “E-Ray.” Sounds like a rejected Pokémon that evolves into a tax credit. Chevrolet slapped a hybrid badge on America’s sports-car sweetheart and expected us to cheer. Instead, we gagged. You took the snarling, tire-shredding V8 poetry of a C8 and grafted on electric motors like Frankenstein bolting on a Tesla coil. Congratulations: 0-60 in 2.5 seconds… and a soul that flatlines at the first regenerative-braking hiccup.
The marketing department deserves its own circle in automotive hell. Billboards scream “ALL-WHEEL DRIVE!” as if four driven wheels make up for the existential crisis under the hood. Newsflash: Corvettes were rear-drive rebels; turning them into AWD appliances is like giving James Dean a minivan and calling it “edgy.” Sure, it’ll claw out of a snowy driveway, but so will a Subaru with winter tires and half the ego.
Price? A casual $104,000 base—before you tick the “I’m compensating” boxes. For that, you get 655 horsepower and the nagging suspicion your grandkids will mock the “e” in the badge. Real enthusiasts are cross-shopping Z06s or used C7 ZR1s that don’t need a wall socket to feel alive.
GM, do the merciful thing: E-RASE the E-Ray. Let it fade into the same footnote as the SSR, the Aztek, and every other identity crisis on wheels. The Corvette deserves fire, not a night-light. Torch it, bury the ashes, and bring back something that roars instead of humming like a dentist’s office. America’s sports car shouldn’t need a charging cable—unless it’s jump-starting your regret.
Lastly, to show you how bought and pad off the major auto media is, has ANYONE else besides US had the guts to call this rubbish bin out?
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